Friday, March 8, 2013

Peer Review Note of Dameans First Draft Rhetorical Analysis


In the wake of the Age of Enlightenment, and on the heels of the United States Declaration of Independence, The Declaration of the Rights of Man and of the Citizen jump started a revolution in France that effectively brought the country from darkness to light in a matter of 10 years. (Thesis)At the forefront of the proposed declaration was Marquis de La Fayette (Lafayette). Already a war hero from actions in the American Revolutionary War, Lafayette became the vice president of the assembly that drafted the Declaration of the Rights of Man and of the Citizen.

Your thesis does not support your document.  There is something missing to make it standout. …no hook. 

 Potential Thesis Statements: Wealth and birthrights could not stop the influences from the Enlightenment.  One such individual that played a major role in the American Revolution War and the creation of “The Declaration of the Rights of Man and of the Citizen” was Marie Joseph Paul Yves Roche Gilbert du Motier, or Marquis de Lafayette.

OR

Influences from a 20 year old rich boy from France that changed America and France.  Marie Joseph Paul Yves Roche Gilbert du Motier, or Marquis de Lafayette was one that did.

 
Born named Marie Joseph Paul Yves Roche Gilbert du Motier, Marquis de Lafayette was born in Chavaniac France, which was later named after Lafayette himself to become Chavaniac-Lafayette. He was born 6 September 1757 to a strong military heritage with a wealth of money. His parents died while Lafayette was still young, leaving him with 25,000 livres (equal to a pound of sliver), which in today’s economy would be roughly $100,000. After the death of his uncle, Lafayette inherited 120,000 livres yearly, roughly $480,000. With thoughts of the romantic American cause, glory and excitement, Lafayette made plans to travel to America.  After being forbidden to leave France by the King and his family, and support the American Revolution, Lafayette jumped through hoops to get to America, ultimately disguising himself as a woman as well as buying the cargo on the ship he was riding so the captain wouldn’t stop in the West Indies, fearful of arrest.

Commissioned by Congress as a Major General, Lafayette was a major commander in the American Revolution from 1777 to 1781. He fought and commanded at the Battles of Brandywine, Gloucester, Barren Hill, Monmouth, Rhode Island, Green Spring, and the Siege of Yorktown. Wounded at the Battle of Brandywine, he healed and rejoined George Washington at Valley Forge.  He returned to France in December of 1781 as a war hero after the defeat of Cornwallis at Yorktown, Virginia. He was later appointed to the Assembly of Notables to address, among other things, the growing sentiment of non-nobility having to pay taxes in support of an overly wealthy monarchy. The Assembly of Notables eventually evolved into the National Assembly, which led to the Tennis Court Oath. The draft of the “Declaration of the Rights of Man and of the Citizen” was submitted, which King Louis XVI didn’t approve of because it stripped him of perks given by the divine rights of kings. Due to the king’s lack of support, the Bastille, the representation of royal authority in Paris, was stormed, marking the start of the French Revolution and the French Revolutionary Wars.

The “Declaration of the Rights of Man and of the Citizen” was an extremely important document. Recognition of the natural, inalienable, and sacred rights of man were contained in 17 numbered sentences. They echoed the sentiment of common people in France while subtly telling the story of the past and the position of kings; it gave insight into a fruitful future using ideals that were a direct reflection of Enlightenment ideas. There are some prime examples of this throughout the declaration.

The first sentence, “Men are born and remain free and equal in rights; social distinction may be based only upon general usefulness.” sets the stage for the rest of the declaration. It establishes that, because all men are born with equal rights, your status is performance based. There is a sort of tearing away of the idea that nobility is more important than the lower class. Lafayette did not see himself better than the average soldier.  He was on the front lines commanding. He was their equal.

The second sentence establishes the rights of man as well as the government’s basic responsibilities. “The aim of every political association is the preservation of the natural and inalienable rights of man; these rights are liberty, property, security, and resistance to oppression.” It states that protection of each person’s natural rights should be of most importance to political institutions. It brings to light some Enlightenment ideas incorporated into the rights that man will have under the declaration. Natural and inalienable rights are pretty much the same thing. It means the rights that you’re born with aren’t dependent upon laws or a particular government. Lafayette used his own funds to support the American cause.  He lived this second sentence.

One sentence proclaims, “Since every man is presumed innocent until declared guilty, if arrest be deemed indispensable, all unnecessary severity for securing the person of the accused must be severely repressed by law.” This states that, it should be assumed that every man is innocent until proven guilty, and that if arrest is necessary, the enforcer of the law must not harm the “assumed” innocent. This mixes natural rights with legal rights. It gives a person the freedom to do what they want as well as the right to be treated fairly.  He protected the Royal Family from a Paris mob on 8 October 1789. He believed in this principle.

Another states that, “Free communication of ideas and opinions is one of the most precious of the rights of man. Consequently, every citizen may speak, write, and print freely, subject to the abuse of such liberty in the cases determined by law.” Before this declaration, common people were severely repressed. The only people that represented themselves through writing, speech, and print were in nobility or someone appointed by nobility. Even then, those appointed expressed the view of nobility and not really their own. The idea that you could have the freedom to think for yourself and do for yourself is a popular enlightenment idea.

The 12th declaration reads, “The guarantee of the rights of man and citizen necessitates a public force; therefore, is instituted for the advantage of all and not for the particular benefit of those to whom it is entrusted.” This essentially stated that nobility couldn’t have their own “army” because everyone is entitled to be protected as their legal right. This challenged the divine right of kings. Although subtly, it stated that the nobility had abused their power, by using their own armies for their personal protection, not for the protection of their people. Lafayette endured being imprisoned by the Austrians and Prussians for about 5 years as a political prisoner as he fled to Belgium from the Jacobin influence.

With the exposure of Enlightenment ideals, and the growing displeasure with King Louis XVI, the French Revolution was born. The Declaration of the Rights of Man was proposed within the first year, seeking to change the old ways in France. The enlightenment ideas that found their way into the declaration made it clear that a shift in France was necessary for growth. Lafayette established himself as a credible authority figure and key player during the ensuing revolution. He paid for his decisions with the loss of all his property and wealth he had possessed in France. In the midst of the French Revolutionary Wars, King Louis XVI was executed. He was found guilty of high treason and executed by guillotine, effectively ending 1000 years of French monarchy. The French Declaration of the Right of Man and Citizen marked an important turning point in France, fueling a revolution that would spark some extremely volatile events, but proving a key enlightenment ideal, Progress.

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